A post-apocalyptic world where zombies dominated would definitely offer up a lot of major parenting questions and decisions. What if my kid turns into a “walker”? Do I hide them and hope there’s a cure someday? Would I follow a maniac who calls himself The Governor, if it meant temporary safety for my kid? If walkers chased after my kid, would I risk my life and run after her, even if a team of armed men was helping me? Has my obsession with zombies and the show The Walking Dead gone too far?
This post contains spoilers, so please go and watch the show before you read. I don’t care if you have to hide in your closet with your phone to watch The Walking Dead, pretend you’ve got diarrhea and hangout in the bathroom or lose sleep to watch it. It is that good and it’s essential in preparation for a zombie apocalypse, because it’s completely plausible, right? If you disagree, then go and watch Contagion first. It’s a preface to The Walking Dead, at least as I see it.
This leads me to the hypothetical questions this show has posed and forced me to lie awake and stare at the ceiling thinking about. If you’re sure you’ll never watch the show, you can still read this post and obsess over…uh, I mean ponder your answers to these questions too.
If a walker chased your kid into a forest, would you risk your life and run after him/her, even if a team of armed men was helping you?
Brief synopsis: Carol was posed with this question and needed to make a quick decision, when a walker discovered her daughter Sophia while she was hiding. Sophia got scared and ran into the forest. The walker chased after Sophia. Carol stood there and then let her friends hold her back, while three men with guns, knives or bows and arrows ran to Sophia’s rescue.
My thoughts: WTF? I’ll say it louder…WTF?!?! If my daughter ran into a forest and a walker chased after her, I would have the strength of seven Sampsons. I could break free from any friends’ grip and chase after her, even if there was a whole army trying to rescue her. How can you count on someone else to protect your own kid from zombies? What if she gets lost and they are forced to give up their search (which is exactly what happened)? I would rather become a zombie, then sit back and count on someone else to save my child.
What if your kid turned into a walker? Would you hide them and hope there’s a cure someday? Or, would you assume that being a walker sucks and put them out of their misery?
Brief synopsis: The group searches for Carol’s daughter Sophia for an entire season. The longer they search, the less there is hope that she hasn’t already changed. Towards the end of the season, it’s discovered that Hershel, a farmer that they’ve all been staying with, has hidden several walkers in his barn. It’s never clear what the reason is, but we do learn that his wife is among them. The rest of them finally discover the barn-walkers and spend a couple of episodes fighting over how to handle the situation. Shane, in a rogue state of distress, opens the barn door and they end up having to shoot them all. But, wait, there is one last walker…and it’s Sophia. Rick, the leader, shoots her. Carol stands back and cries.
My thoughts: Again, WTF? Why do all of these people assume being a walker is so terrible? How do they know walkers suffer? It’s like saying if you’re in a coma, it’s definitive that your mind stops. And, if there’s a cure someday, why not try to keep your loved one alive? Maybe not for years, but until it appears there may really be no hope. (Note: Shaun of the Dead spoiler ahead) Simon Pegg kept his best friend, who turned into a zombie, in his shed and they still played video games together. What was wrong with that?
The minute Carol sees her daughter, she cries but doesn’t run to her. Again, someone holds her back, but this is her kid we’re talking about. Here is where I would need an entire army to hold me back. My child may have turned into a blood-sucking walker, but she’s still my child. I love my child no matter whether she wants to eat my brain or not. Geez.
Would you follow a maniac who calls himself The Governor, if it meant temporary safety for your kid? What if he and his minions had set-up a civilized life for everyone with cold lemonade, scotch and warm showers?
Brief synopsis: During a zombie invasion at the farm, Andrea, one of the original cast members, gets separated from everyone and runs into Michonne, a tougher than nails chick who walks around with a katana and her loved ones in neck shackles. The two hangout together for several months, until they are found by a man, who calls himself The Governor, and his minions. They are transported to a small, but heavily guarded town with several other minions who are living a fairly civilized, post-apocalyptic life with showers, beds, water and booze.
Michonne wants to leave, because she’s suspicious of The Governor. Andrea wants to stay and feel “normal” for a while. Michonne leaves. That same night Andrea is taken to an uncivilized show that the town has put on. Basically, it’s WWF with zombies in shackles making up the ring. And, get this, there are young kids egging on the fighters from the audience.
My thoughts: There is food, water and temporary safety there for your kid. If you’re on your own and have no kids, then by all means leave with the bad$$S chick with the katana, but if you have kids you may be forced to stay. You still have your own bedroom and privacy. You can still teach your children right from wrong. There are zombies out there. You can go for long stretches without food, but your kid can’t. Unless you’re a trained shooter and have access to unlimited bullets, you don’t have much of a chance out there, until your kid is old enough. I say wait it out and tell your kid to close his/her eyes during the zombie WWF shows.
The other side of me says run like mad and find Simon Pegg at the Winchester. He’ll know what to do.
Would you let your kid shoot you, if you knew you were going to turn into a walker?
Brief synopsis: Laurie has an affair with her husband’s best friend, Shane, while she thinks her husband, Rick, is dead. Somehow she forgot that you could still get pregnant in a zombie post-apocalyptic world and she gets knocked up. Rick is alive. Laurie and Rick already have a son together named Carl. Over time and tough experiences, Carl learns how to use a pistol.
Laurie goes into labor, during a zombie invasion, and is left with a young woman named Maggie and her son, Carl. Something goes wrong with the birth and she starts to bleed, so Maggie has to give her a C-section. Laurie is losing a lot of blood and there’s no way she’ll survive, so she knows she’ll turn into a zombie. After the birth, Carl tells Maggie to wait by the door and shoots his mother (or at least we’re led to believe he does or tries to).
My thoughts: Take the gun and shoot yourself. Seriously? You’re going to make your kid shoot his own mother? First, this woman has an affair with her husband’s best friend and fails to use birth control, while zombies are running rampant. Then, she makes her son shoot her. WTF x 3?!?!?
If you can’t shoot yourself, tell your son to find his dad or someone else and have them finish you off. Or, let them keep you on a leash, until someone finds a cure. Who are these people?
I’ve said it before, if everyone turns into a zombie, I hope I can find an unchanged Simon Pegg and spend my final days drinking pints with him and his crew at the Winchester.